For most of my 20’s, I had a very poor relationship with myself. I was always striving for external satisfaction whilst my inner dialogue was judgmental, critical, and negative. I never felt like I was good enough or worthy. The truth is, I didn’t even know who I was under all the layers of guilt, expectation, and anxiety I had built up around me.
So many of us go through life disconnected from our inner self, looking for something else (or someone else) to complete us. When we draw our awareness deeper inwards, we begin to feel supported, guided, and at peace. Like any relationship, the one we have with ourself requires time and commitment to build.
Cultivating a healthy relationship with one’s self often takes a lifetime to master. Though we often speak negatively and critically to ourselves, you’ll benefit more from quiet encouragement and a positive approach. Meditation helped me find focus and a more positive outlook. When I signed up to this free 30 Day Meditation Challenge, it was like a gift to myself. It gave me the space and time I needed to sink into stillness and become more aware.
Today, I’m sharing 10 ways to help you connect to yourself on a deeper level.
1. Check in with yourself regularly.
How often do you check in with yourself? Start by asking yourself a simple question: How do I feel right now? Then note your response. Tune into your body and notice what it’s telling you. Pay attention to that fluttering in your chest or belly.
2. Find silence.
We live in a world full of information, noise, and demands on our time and attention. When we jump off the merry-go-round for a while and get silent, we tune into our deeper self.
Try taking just five minutes each morning or night to sit in silence and just be present. You don’t need to worry about emptying all thoughts from your head; instead simply notice the thoughts, letting them go and returning to your centre.
3. Focus on your breath.
You can do this anywhere and at anytime, so it’s a great way to connect with yourself throughout the day. Focusing on your breath helps to ground you and draw you deeper into your inner self.
Just focus on your breath, by bringing your awareness to it. Then follow it as you inhale and exhale. Feel the rise of your chest as it fills you right up, following it all the way to your belly and out again. Repeat for as long as you feel necessary.
4. Feel all the feelings.
When times get tough, we often push on and cover up how we feel in an attempt to hold things together. In doing so, we disconnect from our inner self as all our feelings and emotions are there to tell us something.
Let yourself feel all the feelings. Have the courage to sit with the difficult or uncomfortable emotions and fears. Be compassionate with yourself and tune into your breath to keep yourself grounded.
5. Try automatic writing.
Automatic writing is a great way to tap into your inner wisdom and deepen your connection to yourself. Grab a notebook or journal and start by asking yourself a question such as: “What do I need to know today?” Listen for the answer and write it all down.
The trick is not to think too much about what you are writing, but let your pen flow across the page without editing, judgment, or guilt. This is a great tool when we feel stuck, as often we already have all the answers we need; we just need to uncover them.
6. Create a morning ritual.
Make time each morning before you begin your day to sit and tune into yourself. Even if all you can find is five minutes, make it a regular practice to check in with yourself each morning and spend time doing something that nourishes your soul.
You might want to set an intention for the day, spend time in meditation, break out your journal, or repeat positive affirmations. Whatever works for you and however much time you have, make it a daily practice to deepen your connection to yourself.
7. Become aware of your thoughts.
The things we focus on are the things that become our reality, so start becoming aware of your thoughts. Notice where fear or self-criticism arise for you. Don’t place any judgment on these thoughts but consciously choose to let them go or reframe them into a new perspective. When we are able to do this, we are more equipped to manifest the things we truly desire.
8. Move your body.
See movement and exercise as a form of self-love instead of a chore. Listen to what your body needs and flow with it rather than forcing yourself to do something that feels like a chore.
Take a walk in nature, dance around your kitchen, run, go to a class, or hit your yoga mat. Choose to do what feels expansive and freeing to your body. Really feel what it is like to move and stretch your body, anchoring into any sensations that come up for you.
9. Do more of what makes you happy.
What really makes your heart sing? What lights you up? Maybe it’s painting or getting creative. Perhaps you love to prepare a nourishing meal for yourself and your family or to get outside into nature. Whatever you love to do, do it more often. Where can you make room in your schedule for these activities? What can you drop from your to-do list to allow yourself to tune into your internal joy?
10. Smile!
Start each day by greeting yourself in the mirror. Take time to connect by looking into your own eyes. Smile at yourself, and feel your vibration rise. You could even speak a positive affirmation or mantra out loud to yourself in the mirror. Acknowledge your own presence before you go about your day.
These small and daily actions help us deepen our connection to ourselves. They help us stay grounded, gain confidence, and live in alignment with what we really want.
What daily mantras or routines keep you connected with your true passions? Share in the comment section below.
