Question: I have a little crush on my yoga instructor. Do you think it's okay to flirt with her or even ask her out? Lars
The Answer
Ah, the good ol’ yoga teacher-student relationship question. This one gets thrown around all the time, especially regarding ethics in a yoga space. So, in my opinion, it comes down to a whole bunch of different factors.
Plain and simple, you have to be respectful of the fact that she’s the teacher and you’re the student. Just like in any kind of “classroom” setting, there are boundaries that must be drawn, and depending on the situation, those boundaries will vary. Some teachers, as soon as they begin their yoga career, decide they will never date a student, because it doesn’t align with their ethics-while others will see it as no big deal. If a teacher feels like a student is interested in him, he should let that student know his position on the situation, otherwise, things could get super cloudy and sometimes very awkward.
You should absolutely feel comfortable around your instructor, just as she should feel comfortable around you. If you choose to attempt to get to know your teacher on a different level, be aware of signals. If she isn’t reciprocating the feelings that you’re giving out, take the hint. If you feel yourself unable to stop, I strongly suggest finding a new teacher. I can’t stress enough how important it is to be respectful of people’s limits, whether they’re your teachers or not.
Additional Tips
Remember what the role of a yoga instructor truly is- to create a safe and inviting space for students to grow, breathe, and process. In order to create this place, we must be kind, sincere, warm, and charismatic. We give hands on adjustments to help you dive deeper into your poses and facilitate more of that comforting feeling (So, most likely, when a teacher has his or hands on you, it’s not because they want to go on a date, but instead want to keep you safe and at ease). To be blunt, try not to confuse the typical roles and characteristics of a yoga instructor as anything more, unless you truly feel like it is (and in that case, be respectful, as described in my advice above).
